The nothingness that is me

I was seeing that everyone else had lists so I decided to start one, but I don't know how long it will be. I am going to try to add to it when I can.

1. I obviously follow the crowd often. (hence a list like others I have seen)
2. I joined the Navy because I was unemployed and had a family to provide for.
3. I really don't have any close friends anymore, just frequent acquaintances(most have transferred when we became real good friends)
4. I was always anti-govt(reference green mohawk in profile), but now love being in the Navy.
5. I never finish anything I start for myself.
6. In high school I was a freak, but smarter than most of the preps.
7. In Algebra 3 I made a prep cry by making fun of her for scoring higher than her on a test I took when I was stoned.
8. I drink and smoke too much.
9. I will spend a total of 5 years in the Navy and not see a ship, unless we finally take the field trip to see the USNS Comfort.
10. Kurt Cobain a god to me, I wish I can be as cool as him(off drugs and alive though).

11. I used to cut myself, once carving "Fuck You" in my forearm. Only a few scars are still visible.
12. I think I have been depressed my whole life, but never been/wanted to be treated for it.
13. I have committed several crimes from theft to arson and never been caught(No one was ever hurt).
14. I grew up in a small town that was boring hence #11-13.
15. I used to have a pair of red contacts and a pair of white ones. I wore them for almost 2 years sometimes wearing one of each.
16. I worked at a car wash and scared people with my contacts.
17. I worked at Taco Bell and scared customers with my contacts.
18. I once met a full blooded Native American Nazi wannabe.
19. I am shy.
20. My longest real relationship was a month before my ex-wife.

21. I met my soul mate in 7th grade. I sat next to her in Mr. Ingleman's science class, he used to always say "quicker, faster, sooner" really fast. I messed up by not waiting for her and moving on to the now ex-wife.
22. I lack self confidence.
23. I am pretty laid back, but have a bad temper. When I reach that breaking point watch out.
24. I know several ways to break arms, legs, and necks.
25. I have 4 tats, including a dragon, barbed wire, a four leaf clover, and the Navy emblem.
26. I had 6 or 7 jobs in the year I was 18 through a temp service. none were simultaneous, I didn't quit any, I was not hire in or laid off.
27. I was fired from Taco Bell 3 times, they kept hiring me back.
28. I love poetry. I always try to write it but always think it sounds like shit.
29. I really have no talents.
30. I am always complaining about being bored but usually too lazy to get up and do something.

31. I still own a small boy scout rope that I traded a friend in 3rd grade a chocolate milk for, he died that summer in a car crash.
32. I hate all "top ...." lists, they all always piss me off. Especially when it's about music.
33. In high school I was only in one fight. A football player tried to shove me into a locker my freshman year. I punched him in the temple then repeatedly bashed his head into the lockers. I went to study hall like nothing happened. No one messed with me again through high school.
34. I save/collect stupid things, from movie tickets to beads from places where I have fun.
35. When I'm bored I sometimes do searches for old friends names on the net. I have found things from poems posted when they were 12 to crimes committed.
36. I drive a mini van. It's the only thing I got from the divorce, because I pay for it.
37. My first car was a 91 Dodge Shadow. I paid $1,000 for it and put in $1,000 stereo system, when it thumped it felt like the car was going to crumble under me.
38. I listen to music about 10hrs a day. I have over 80hrs of music on my comp at work.
39. I officially became an adult the moment I saw my son. I stopped doing everything stupid I did in high school and growing up.
40. I am not photogenic, mainly because I have a giraffe neck. It's really long.

41. Number 13 is no longer valid after being arrested on Easter for DUI.
42. This DUI is my first time getting in trouble with the cops other than several speeding tickets.
43. I have had 5 speeding tickets and one reckless op for doing doughnuts in a parking lot but it was thrown out after I graduated.
44. I have shed tears to movies involving children, such as John Q, Jersey girl, and unfortunately the end of Con Air. Only because I think of my own son.
45. I usually don't cry but some times it does feel good.
46. I can cry on que, I used to try to get out of trouble with my parents, usually didn't work though.
47. I orveranalyze everything after the fact and think of ways I could of acted to avoid the predictment I ended up end.
48. My favorite TV show is The Simpson's, I used to be like Bart but over the Years now see myself as Homer, except I can't gain weight.
49. I have no people skills.
50. I am usually a good judge of charater.

51, I have always had a variety of friends since high school. I have intellectual friends, jock friends, and my favorite the crazy goth/or punk friends that usually understand me more.
52. I try to be intellectual but usually make myself sound dumb.
53. I sometimes understand what women want but still can't be "that guy" I end up being myself and that isn't what they want.
54. My command is going to start treating me like an alcoholic because I got a DUI>
55. I hate recieving negative attention though sometimes I feel it's better than being ignored.
56. I love all music with a good melody though don't care for country I sometimes find myself tapping my toe to it.
57. I have only opened myself up to 2 people in my life one my ex and the other I believe to be my soul mate(refer to #21)
58. I have a very bad short term memory though I can remember evey detail of some memories of my childhood.
59. My farite food is lasagna, favorite band is Nirvana, favorite song is "Where did you sleep last night"
60. It is hard to pick favorite movie I enjoy those that relate to me: SLC Punk, Butterfly Effect, Fear and Loathing in Las Vagasand some for pure enjoyment: The Crow, American History X, and Clockwork Orange.

61. I enjoy people watching and trying to figure out why people are the way they are.
62. I rarely take any medication, even motrin, I figure my body will be stronger if it fights it itself.
63. I usually don't go to the doctor even though it's free in the military.
64. I gag on big pills, I started taking a once daily vitamin and had troubles swallowing it.
65. My dream is to go on Fear Factor, just to say I did it. They do some cool shit on there, besides eating some stuff which I think can't be what they say due to FDA regs.
66. I am a Corpsman(Medical) but I forget almost all of my 16 weeks of medical training.
67. I am a radiation health tech for the navy and a health physisist at my second job and forget most of my 10 weeks of training.
68. My job is so simple a 10 year old could do it. You point a meter at stuff, if it beeps alot you tell someone to clean it, repeat as nessasary. Boring but good money.
69. I don't really have a favorite color. Sometimes I like orange, or bright green, or red, or black.
70. I am pretty sure I have adult ADD.

71. I work to much. Monday- Friday from 6am-7pm, with both my jobs.
72. I am an only child and I think it has caused me to hate being alone, though I deal with it. I like to have someone there when I think of my little quirks.
73. I sometimes play the "what if..." game in my head. What if I kicked my boss in the head, what would really happen. Stuff like that.
74. I am pretty sure I am mentally insane but just have a conscience that keeps me from doing the things that go through my head.
75. I think it's messed up that it takes me like two weeks to think up 75 things about me.
76. I used to want to be an architect, I still plan on drawing the plans for my house.
77. I used to do construction. I laid sidewalk, re-did roofs, and built one house. I kind of want to help build my house too.
78. I wonder a lot how I cam to the field I am in now, I enjoy working with my hands.
79. I enjoy trying different foods, before I moved here I was limited to fake chinese and mexican. I now enjoy Thai and Vietnameese.
80. I talk a lot of shit.

81. Most of my friends are older than me and range from 27-35. Canowine is the oldman.
82. I feel really vulnerable putting this stuff about me on the net and don't really know why I am doing it.
83. People who don't "know me" now know more about me than probably anyone who has met me.
84. When I am in my car driving to my second job I always think of stuff to add to this list but when I get to a computer, I forget it.
85. I like to be around outgoing people, they help me not be shy.
86. My face turns red and I sweat when I am nervous.
87. Above happens almost everytime I talk to a cute girl.(I know I am pathetic)
88. I don't think I am actually scared of anything. I get nervous sometimes but not actually scared.
89. I hate that dream that your falling. I still don't know how it happens. I can never remember what led to the falling.
90. I very rarely remember my dreams, I wish I could. They usually fade in minutes.

91. I still have 2 baby teeth in my mouth that will probably never come out.
92. I hate the village people for having a guy dressed like a sailor in the group.
93. I like to dance at clubs, but don't think I'm good at it. Clubs should play songs you can slow dance to.
94. My freshman year of High school I went the entire year without wearing my glasses, my eyes are really bad. I had the really cheap plastic glasses until I saved enough money to get contacts.
95. When I was younger I had a pineapple haircut. You know where everything is shaved down except bangs, yeah it was bad.
96. I noticed almost all the t-shirts I have are from high school, the only new ones are from concerts.
97. I eat Ramen noodle packs pretty much on a daily basis, usually for lunch.
98. I was once within arms reach of president Bush with a loaded 9mm on my waist, doing security.
99. I did security for a Disturbed/Chevelle/Taproot concert hoping to meet the bands. Closest I got was a pat on the back from the lead singer of Taproot(they had that song called Poem) while holding back 50 15 year olds.
100! I love meeting new people, the Navy is awesome for that. I have met a ton of cool ass people from all over the world. It just sucks when you become really good friends with them and then you or them get PCS(move). It is hard to stay in touch.


I finally reached 100!!!!!!!!!! It only took me like 2 weeks, God I am boring.